Just in the nick of time and right before Valentine’s Day. Here is my Top 13 (because 10 just ain’t enough) Unconventional Love Stories. I command thee to seek them out and watch them! So Says Dick Hollywood. Films are in Alpha Order because, well just because… And I left off Harold and Maude on purpose, because most likely everybody has either seen it or heard about it already, but I do think that it is one of the all time best unconventional love stories.

Angel Baby (1995)

Love this Australian Flick Directed by Michael Rhymer, about two schizophrenics who meet in group therapy, fall in love and decide to have a baby.

Carrington (1995)

The story of the relationship between Painter Dora Carrington and Author Lytton Strachey and their strong connection for each other. A platonic relationship, due to Strachey’s sexual orientation, but emotionally they loved each other deeply.

Crazy Love (2007)

Bizarre Documentary that explores the troubled relationship between Burt Pugach and Linda Riss. The title of this Flick is not kiddin’ and it is Pretty Fuckin’ Crazy!

Leaving Las Vegas (1995)

Ben is planning on drinking himself to death in Las Vegas and gets caught up romantically with Sera a prostitute, in John O’Brien and Mike Figgis’ tragedy.

Lunatics: A Love Story (1991)

Hank is crazy and I mean Bat Shit Crazy. Nancy is in trouble and I mean Big Trouble. When there two worlds collide sparks begin to fly. If only they could get through all of Hank’s tin foil.

Niagara Niagara (1997)

From IMDB: “An outsider and a young woman plagued by Tourette’s syndrome meet and together journey to Canada.”

Remains of the Day (1993)

Unrequited love has never been captured better than in Remains of the Day. What an amazing restrained and subtle performance from Anthony Hopkins. My favorite Merchant/Ivory Production.

Secretary (2002)

I see nothing wrong with a little domination and submission in the work place. Nothing wrong at all…

Sid and Nancy (1986)

The scene with the garbage falling on them while they are kissing says it all. Love Love Love It!

Tie Me Up Tie Me Down (1990)

Kidnapping an Actress and tying her to the bed until she falls in love with you seems absurd. Quite absurd indeed…

Waking the Dead (2000)

From IMDB: “A congressional candidate questions his sanity after seeing the love of his life, presumed dead, suddenly emerge.” This is an underrated little gem of a film with great turns by Billy Crudup and Jennifer Connelly. Seek it out!

Wings of Desire (1988)

An Angel gives up is wings and decides to become human when he falls for a Circus Performer and wants to experience life. One of Wim Wenders best!

Wristcutters: A Love Story (2006)

Boy kills himself when his girl breaks up with him and goes to some strange purgatory reserved for suicides. Girl offs herself 3 months later and has been spotted in the very same purgatory. Boy searches for his “True Love” in the afterlife…

“The Innkeepers” is Writer/Director/Editor Ti West’s follow up to his Indie Horror hit “The House of the Devil”. A “Haunted Hotel type story set in the final few days before the Yankee Pedlar Inn cloes their doors for good. Claire (Sara Paxton) and Luke (Pat Healy) are the last two remaining employees in the place are trying to get proof that the Inn is truly one of New England’s “most haunted hotels”.

Mr. West likes his films to burn slow and burn slowly this film does. Much of the film relies on the charms of Claire as she goes about her mundane job with a cute and awkward goofiness. Luke dreams of making money from his website on the haunted Yankee Peddler and wants to get some ghostly EVP (Electronic Voice Phenomena) recordings to add validity to the site. So the two take to wandering around and recording in separate shifts as the other one gets some shut eye in one of the hotel rooms. Along the way, they have run-ins with the last few remaining guests including an Ex TV Star and now New Age Guru (Top Gun’s Kelly McGilis).

Ti West has fun playing with his audience and deconstructing the traditional jump scare, utilizing it in self-referential way. The real scares come from the tension he builds utilizing a great sound editing and some arm hair raising creepiness. All in all, “The Innkeepers” is not a great film, but it sure is on hell of a fun one, eliciting more scary and chilling moments then all of the lame Paranormal Activity “Found Footage Flicks” combined!

The Innkeepers gets Dick Hollywood’s Seal of Approval

“The InnKeepers” is currently on VOD and opens Friday Feb 3rd for a limited theatrical run in select cites.

With Director Ben Wheatley’s second Flick, he brings us a Genre mash-up of British Mike Leigh type improvised drama, some British Crime, and a smidgen of Horror. Jay(Neil Maskell) and Gal (Michael Smiley) are a couple of hired hit men whose last job was eight months ago in Kiev, which seems to have ended badly and messed Jay up in the head pretty badly. They both need to do another job to make some money and to pay the bills, especially Jay, since he also supports his wife, Shel (MyAnna Buring) and daughter. Gal and his latest girlfriend come over to dinner one night, so he can propose a new job to Jay. By the end of the visit Jay agrees take on the three hit contract with Gal. Get in, do the hits and get’er done, so he can go back to his normal family life with Shel who is aware of his profession.

The meeting with the Client almost goes badly as he grabs a hold of Jay’s hand and slices his palm open. He then proceeds to cut his own hand and the two of them let the would drip onto a paper contract. The deal is literally sealed in blood. Might have been the time to back out of this “what the fuck?” meeting and commitment to a client they both have never met. The banter between Gal and Jay is quite funny and realistic and a good majority of the flick was improvised by the three main leads. As the hits begin, Gal gets increasing more violent and brutal, and wants to back out of the job. He realizes that he is losing it and has a bad feeling about finishing the job.

The Kill List, to me, felt like more of a mood piece. A hallucinatory cryptic mind fuck that never allows you to know which way is up, as the situations they get into are not what they seem. It’s an unsettling and deliberately slow-paced flick that builds to a too quick of an ending that does not really add up. Even though the clues are there, it still feels rushed and messy. I had been hearing really good things about this flick, maybe too many really good things, as well as a little too much of the plot. I prepared to and really wanted to love  it but I ended up only liking it, due to the fact that my expectations were maybe a little to high. What I am really saying of course, is that my expectations were too fuckin’ high and I should try not listen to and read all of the hype that some flicks garner! And just because I didn’t love it, doth not make it a bad flick per se. As I already told ya, I liked it.

So Says Dick Hollywood!

Kill List is currently on VOD and opens Friday Feb 3rd for a limited theatrical run in select cites.