A Hobo, A Murderous Tire, and some Chicken & Beer: Count Dick Hollywood In!

When I received this invite in my email box:

Wednesday Double Header! HOBO WITH A SHOT GUN And RUBBER


Two of this Spring’s wildest rides with free poultry and suds!

In between screenings enjoy some chicken and beer

Well what else could I possibly do, but RSVP to these Flicks ASAP and see if I could bring a guest to get in on this delicious offer of food, beer and silly double feature.  Arriving just before 5pm, my guest and I sign in and take a seat in the screening room. A fellow critic talked the PR people into passing out a beer to the audience before the first Flick started, so I gladly accepted one of the Natural Light Beers and cracked that mutha fucka open!.

First up: Hobo With A Shotgun

A Hobo comes riding into to town on a freight train looking to make a change in his wandering rootless ways. He has his eye on an old lawnmower at a local pawn shop and starts to raise the money by appearing in a bum fight video and humiliating himself in the process. This town is corrupt, really really corrupt, and while the Hobo prepares to buy his lawn mower he witnesses a robbery in progress and decides to take a stand by choosing a shotgun over the mower. And then all Hell breaks loose.

“Hobo With A Shotgun: Delivering Justice One Shell At A Time” This Hobo is out to wash this town clean of all the filth and crime that it has succumbed too. Just like Melvin the Mop Boy did when he turned into “The first Super-Hero… from New Jersey!” This Flick lovingly pays homage to both Lloyd Kaufman’s The Toxic Avenger and J. Michael Muro’s Street Trash. It is a crass cartoon-ish revenge flick with buckets of blood that fills the screen from scene to scene. This Hobo is as mad as hell and he ain’t going to take it anymore, blasting the filth off of the streets, while trying to make it a decent town again. Mayhem ensues when the city’s kingpin offers a reward to the town folk to bring him the Hobo, so he can take care of him once and for all.

Well I could tell you that there were multiple decapitations, burning school buses, mutilation by lawnmower, and a very bad Santa, but I will refrain from spoiling the flick for you. For folks who have a nostalgia for 80’s exploitation flicks, this one is just right for you. And for people that do not enjoy cheesy, bloody, campy, over-the-top violence and all around bad taste, then I believe you should just stay away from it. Stay far, far away from it!

Good Times!

-So Says Dick Hollywood

 With an Intermission, I scarfed downed some Kentucky Fried Chicken and threw back a Pabst Blue Ribbon. Mmm Mmm Good Eatin and Drinkin’!

Up Next: Rubber

Robert was just a little ol’ rubber tire buried halfway into the desert sand, when one day he wakes up, and comes to life. He begins to wander around his desert home, and soon he discovers that he enjoys killing and destroying things. Easily rolling over and crushing a scorpion and other small creatures, but not heavy enough to crush a soda bottle. When he stairs down the bottle and begins to shake, the bottle suddenly explodes and shatters into pieces. He then gets all Scanner-like on us, blowing shit up with his Rubber Tire Mind, and soon he is trying it out on small animals and humans that get in his way. He is one bad-ass evil Tire! Then there is the other story in the film that is running at the same time. A group of people are brought out to the desert to watch Robert’s exploits from afar with binoculars as if they were watching a live-action movie.

Between the two stories we get a satirical meta look at moviegoers and horror movie spoof all rolled into one fun little package. Rubber is a slight flick that works because it is fresh and original. It looks self reflexively at movie viewers and absurdest horror premises. It is an enjoyable little film that made Dick Hollywood giggle and smile. Yes, I said giggle…

All in all, a very fun and pleasurable evening was had by Ol’ Dick Hollywood!

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